This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every moring: great is thy faithfulness. The Lord is my portion saith my soul: therefore will I hope in him. The Lord is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that seeketh him. It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD. Lamentations 3: 21-26

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Grains of Gratitude

I found where the globe is warming and it is in my backyard. Help me!! I’m melting!

You know those people who tell you, “It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity.”? They are RIGHT! It is like breathing a glass of water going outside. I’ve lived where humidity is low and was amazed how much easier cold and heat were able to be tolerated. When you step outside and your clothes become glued to your body it is just miserable. Humidity early this morning was about 80%.

In all seriousness, you can always find a silver lining. I am grateful we have the small pool the boys can play in during this heat and let me tell you, I am grateful for having air conditioning and being able to afford to run it!! I remember growing up without it at first and then with a window unit in our living room, but none of my grandparents had air conditioning. We just managed. I suppose I could “manage” now, but I’m thankful I don’t have to.

This “end of summer” last few weeks is a rest time we’ve been looking for. We’ve got two weeks of little to nothing to do outside of the house. No driving!! Whoo—hoo! Let me tell you how grateful I am.

My father has been here for a while. The boys have danced for him, played piano for him, guitar with him, cards with him and conned us all into playing the board game they are stuck on right now, which is Clue. It’s brought back many good summer memories for me. I remember playing cards a lot and board games. I am very glad they are able to share that with my dad. Dad and I have had some good conversations although we don’t agree on politics and religion; we’ve agreed we will disagree for this visit anyway.

I was gone all day yesterday to a class and my husband played host and cook for everyone and made sure everything was good. On top of that, he cleaned my kitchen and I came home to everything shiny and sparkly and everyone in good moods. Grateful, grateful, grateful. He’s done a couple other things to bless me lately. I am so happy that he’s mine.

What are you grateful for?

Grains of Gratitude started at the bloghome of the lovely Christine who is mom of Brady’s Bunch!!

Have a lovely week! Be blessed!

Julie

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Standing Firm/Staying Put (Part Three)

Part One & Part Two

Since the moment I stepped into this duplex I have been trying to figure how to move out again.

But we've decided not to move.

In this home for almost five years God has drawn us back to Him. He has shown us what and who (and WHO) is most important. He has given us opportunities to repair a lot of damage we created. We have gone from in debt over our eyeballs to most likely being debt free by the end of the year. How’s that for a Christmas present?

He has given our sons some stability even when circumstances were less than desirable. He has allowed us opportunities for our sons to find and expand their talents. He has allowed us to homeschool—something we’ve not wanted to compromise on.

In this home we have seen joy, even in the worst of times.

In this home we have learned about contentment.

And I think we (I) have a few more lessons to learn.

*********************************

Since the moment I stepped into this duplex I have been trying to figure how to move out again.

But I am not.

And I am okay with it. At least most of the time. We are pretty sure we will move. We have a target city, although since I’ve opened my mind about staying, I’ve opened up about the location of our future.

This place is where we are going to stay a while longer for a few reasons:

First, while I dislike the neighborhood, it could be worse. It is a known evil.

Second our landlord is easy to get along with. While she’s not great about making this place a palace, she minds her own business and not ours.

Third, the rent is cheap. It would cost us double to rent elsewhere for about five hundred more square feet.

Other thoughts are: it is within walking distance of a bus line, grocery store, library, pharmacy, our insurance agent, gas stations and some doctors’ offices. When you share a wall, either in a duplex, townhome, apartment, whatever, you take chances with the neighbors. We sit out with ours quite often and chat. So again, it could be worse.

We have decided to make this place comfortable. The money that we would have spent moving (deposits, utility changes, etc.) we are going to use for some much needed storage solutions. We are going to save for new appliances. Hopefully the ones we have will last the rest of our time here. We could buy them if we had to, but moving appliances is hard on them and hard on us—I am really getting older!! The last move about wiped me out. I fell down a tiny flight of steps and took three weeks to get over it. And still had to move in the meantime.

We decided to paint if it will make me happier. And you know color does help moods. I’ve taken a good look at what it would involve to paint and maybe it would be a good idea—not easy, but a good idea.

I’ve been reading a lot about people decluttering and minimizing. I never thought I could do that. I’m a packrat, I mean crafter. I love books, I love stuff. But if I don’t get rid of some of this I will have to move it when the time comes. I’ve decided to quit buying things that I don’t need right now. Except books. I mean I am going to quit buying things.

We didn’t come to this decision lightly. Since making it, there have been many incidents that have caused us to rethink our choice. We feel like we are being tested.

But I’ve seen what it looks like when GOD wants you to move. You can try to thumb your nose at Him, but if you allow Him to work it seems to go much easier and the rewards...well they are of God's choosing. I'm finally to the point I'd rather have God's good choices for me than my poor picks.

So for now…We are staying put, standing firm.

*********************************

Coach Jenny wrote a wonderful post that mirrored my thoughts and blessed me to read. I encourage you to check it out!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Standing Firm/Staying Put (Part Two)

Part One

Yesterday I started to tell you about why I am not moving even though I really want to. Even though I am watching other people move and I think it is exciting.

The story starts not almost five years ago when we moved in here, but almost sixteen years ago when we got married.

************************************

When we got married we were not in a good financial position. We tried to avoid our obligations. We lived four miles south of this house. We both had jobs at least 45 minutes from home. We had one car.

Young, newly married, I am embarrassed to admit, very irresponsible, living like two adult children we made a really big mess of things.

And then we ran away.

After three years of marriage we packed up and ran to another state to live near my parents. We both took extremely low paying jobs, but, hey—could it be any worse than the cost of living where we were?

We were about to find out.

One of my major irresponsibilities was a beautiful Morgan show horse, Beau. I was working 40 hours a week in the ophthalmologists’ office to pay the regular bills and at least that many hours at the horse barn where I kept him to pay for his upkeep. It was not a good recipe for a stable marriage. A marriage spent in a stable, maybe, but…yeah it was a bad pun.

Anyway…we ran, horse in tow. And we landed for two months (November and December) in a cardboard box shack clapboard house straight out of Little House on the Prairie. I kid you not. I was really stupid and didn’t take photos. But it was built before the turn of the century. The walls were lathe and plaster and about two inches thick, maybe two inches. We only paid $50 a month for it. It had no furnace. My father bought/loaned us a portable furnace that sat in the dining room. Did I mention--November and December?

Housing improved a little after that we lived in three different farm houses in less than three years. For a short time we lived in what was my favorite place. (The big white farmhouse.)

Then we moved nine hours away, bought a house we never should have, only to manage to sell it days before it was foreclosed on. (The ranch--loved the house, just had no business buying it.)

Then with the boys we moved back and lived with my parents for three impossibly long months and then moved into a tiny (about 900 square foot) duplex--the four of us.

Then because of a job situation, we moved here. I didn’t want to leave where we were. I threw one several of my impressive fits. Still, my husband came, interviewed, got the job and looked for a place for us to live. He found this place and rented it. Because of finances I never got a chance to see it until we pulled up with the moving van.

Here we were--spiritual baggage in tow, debts in hand, worse off financially than when we ran away in the beginning.

About four miles away from the place we ran away from.

I could hear God say, “Here is your second chance. Do it right this time.”

************************************
Promise I'll finish tomorrow!

Julie
Standing Firm/Staying Put: Part One

Monday, July 28, 2008

Standing Firm/Staying Put (Part One)

My friend Jenny--Coach Jenny--is moving. I am so very thrilled for her. I have read her blog and watched everything that has happened in her life to get her family to the point of moving. God opened doors and windows, told them to be patient, and boy oh boy, when He said, “Move!” it happened fast. And they have been obedient. Read her story, it’s so encouraging.

My sister is moving. I am happy for her. Probably happier than she is. She does not want to move. But she’s pretty sure this will be a good thing for her children. She and I have talked about the Rich Mullins song that says, “I’d rather fight You for what I don’t really want, than take what You give that I need…” Yeah, we are there.

I’ve watched doors slam closed to keep her from going one direction (the direction she preferred) and open to point her in others. It has been goose-bump evoking sometimes how everything is working out.

Two people who I care about are moving.

And I am not.

A few people who have gotten to know my through my blog know that I really want to move. I’ve been praying and hoping and planning to move for quite a while.

But I am not moving.

************************************

Since the moment I stepped into this duplex I have been trying to figure how to move out again.

It’s true. What I wanted to write was, “Moving has been on our hearts for a while.” But that is not true. It sounds so much sweeter, but it just isn’t so. My husband and my sons, especially my sons, have been content with the space. I’m the one who wants to get out of "Dodge".

I’ve bucked and whined and thrown countless tantrums to God about this place. It’s ugly and old and ratty. I don’t like the neighborhood. I don’t like the layout. Not enough bathrooms, not enough storage, too far from this, to close to that. And God has patiently listened to all my complaints and did not budge. He has not moved (or let me move) one inch.

So imagine my surprise when out of my mouth came, “I think we should stay at least another year.”

My husband and I were having a conversation, one of how many I’ve lost count, about the pros and cons of moving. He’s heard my complaining almost as often as God has. He was saying that if it was that important, we could consider moving at the end of summer.

Imagine his surprise when I mentioned staying.

I don’t know who was more shocked, him or me.

Tomorrow I will start at the beginning; not almost five years ago when we moved in here, but almost sixteen years ago when we got married.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

The Big Red Button

Found this at Hope Stamps Eternal...it's just the kind of thing I think is funny.


Put The Big Red Button on your site

How far did you click?? I'm not telling. Let me just say...


...there is an end. Just sayin'...

Friday, July 25, 2008

Faith Lift Friday--Christmas in July

Faith Lift Fridays are home at Sheryl's Taking the Challenge. Always uplifting!

I'm in a mood.

Not sure what mood it is, but it's kind of quirky and when I get like this there are some unexpected thoughts that pop into my head and heart.

So here's what's rattling around up there today:

In six months it will be Christmas. Oh, I'm not recommending that we go and start shopping and living out the retail holiday. But it might be a good day to stop and think where we will be six months from now.

Will our hearts be ready for HIM?

Are our hearts ready for HIM everyday?

"No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Be on guard! Be alert! You do not know when that time will come. It's like a man going away: He leaves his house and puts his servants in charge, each with his assigned task, and tells the one at the door to keep watch.

Therefore keep watch because you do not know when the owner of the house will come back—whether in the evening, or at midnight, or when the rooster crows, or at dawn. If he comes suddenly, do not let him find you sleeping. What I say to you, I say to everyone: 'Watch!'" Mark 13:32-37

Welcome to this World

Lyrics and music by Chris Rice



Tears are falling, hearts are breaking
How we need to hear from God
You've been promised, we've been waiting

Welcome Holy Child
Welcome Holy Child

Hope that you don't mind our manger
How I wish we would have known
But long-awaited Holy Stranger
Make Yourself at home
Please make Yourself at home
Bring Your peace into our violence
Bid our hungry souls be filled
Word now breaking Heaven's silence

Welcome to our world
Welcome to our world

Fragile finger sent to heal us
Tender brow prepared for thorn
Tiny heart whose blood will save us
Unto us is born
Unto us is born
So wrap our injured flesh around You
Breathe our air and walk our sod
Rob our sin and make us holy

Perfect Son of God
Perfect Son of God
Welcome to our world

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Books, Books, Books--a Meme After My Heart

Barbara H. had this meme on her blog almost a month ago. I really liked it—it’s about books! How could I not? So I am finally getting around to doing it.

1. Do you remember how you developed a love for reading?
I don’t remember a time in my life without books. My father was an avid reader. There were always books around our home. My mother would not have counted reading as a hobby at that time, but she filled our home with books for me and read to me from the time when I was born until I went to school. She became an avid reader shortly before she got cancer. I inherited many of her books.

2. What are some books you read as a child?
The Summerfolk, Katy and the Big Snow, Mike Mulligan and His Steam Shovel, Tiki Tiki Tembo were some of the books my mother read to me and I’ve collected them to share with my children.

As I began reading independently I read Marguerite Henry’s books—King of the Wind was a favorite. I read the Black Stallion series, My Friend Flicka, the Big Red books, Trixie Beldon and Robin Kane, Betsy and Tacy; all series, so I guess my love for series began early. Also I read very precociously, I read Gone with the Wind and The Godfather in fifth grade—I wouldn’t recommend that for anyone and those books aren’t in my boys “to read” pile.

3. What is your favorite genre? I am a historical fiction nut. I also am very excited with “good” science fiction/fantasy—Frank Herbert, Tolkien, Stephen R. Donaldson. I also like young adult lit for fast reads and have recently enjoyed some good Christian literature. I love King Arthur literature and read a lot of it in college. I took a class devoted to it and considered pursuing a master’s in King Arthur lit—I decided that might not be to practical, but it sounded romantic at the time.

4. Do you have a favorite novel? Helen Hooven Santemeyer’s …and Ladies of the Club. The Morland Dynasty by Cynthia Harrod-Eagles has become my favorite series.

5. Where do you usually read? Either in the big pink blogging recliner or in bed. Also I spend a lot of time in parents’ waiting rooms, so I will read there.

6. When do you usually read? After supper or after the boys are in bed. I often stay up too late reading.

7. Do you usually have more than one book you are reading at a time? Yes, sometimes I get too many going.

8. Do you read nonfiction in a different way or place than you read fiction? No, I just need to read more of it.

9. Do you buy most of the books you read, or borrow them, or check them out of the library? The library is a wonderful place and I always have a lot of books checked out. I keep the Half Price Bookstore in business I am sure, but there are always books for 50 cents or a dollar and it is hard to pass those up. It also saves on shipping and overdue books. I look there first for a book. I don't mind paying retail, but if I don't have to, why bother?

Occasionally we go on a family trip to Barnes and Noble—that usually is a bank breaker (even though we have a buyer membership there) because everyone gets a book—but it is a fun thing when we go. I rarely borrow a book from anyone else—I have more books than anyone else I know in real life. I only have one friend who offers to loan me books—she also sends some home she thinks my dad will like.

10. Do you keep most of the books you buy? If not, what do you do with them? Books are like friends. I can’t get rid of my friends!! Just kidding...sort of.

All of my favorites—Tolkien, Rosamunde Pilcher, Frank Herbert, Stephen Dondalson, I keep. Classics or books I think the boys might like I keep. I’ve got a stash I am saving for my niece who reads like I do, some she’ll get in the near future, some will have to wait. I’ve been culling the herd of children’s books and giving boxes to my friend for my goddaughter and godson. Then there are the homeschool books which have to stick around for a while. There are loads of those.

11. If you have children, what are some of the favorite books you have shared with them? Were they some of the same ones you read as a child? I mentioned some of the ones I loved, Robert McCloskey was another author who I really liked and so was Ezra Jack Keats.

Some that I “found” as the boys were growing up are the original Milne Pooh stories, The Wind in the Willows, Beatrix Potter, Eric Carle, Jan Brett, James Herriot, Thomas the Tank Engine. I love James Gurney’s Dinotopia books. The boys both loved Mercer Mayer’s Little Critter.

12. What are you reading now? I just finished Lauren Winner’s Mudhouse Sabbath, and have The Mirage, number 22 in Cynthia Harrod-Eagles Morland Dynasty series going. I also am reading Sister Teresa by Barbara Mujica, a novel about St. Teresa of Avila. Also I’m working on Christ the Lord: Out of Egypt by Anne Rice because I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. Recently I purchased The South Beach Diet (half price, of course), I gave my copy to my to my dad and decided maybe I should revisit that.

13. Do you keep a TBR (to be read) list? Just piles and stacks and shelves that remind me what a book junkie I am. Actually I do keep a list on the computer. I am embarrassed to admit how many "pages" long it is. I keep it for the day I run out of books to read. Snort.

14. What’s next? I always have books about or for our homeschooling, I rarely “count” those, although maybe I should. If I pre-read or read at the same time a book for the boys I do count those books if they are over a hundred pages. At the top of the pile is When All Hell Breaks Loose You May Be Doing Something Right: Surprising insights from the life of Job by Steven J. Lawson. I found that at one of my bloggy friend’s place. Queste—fourth in Angie Sage’s Septimus Heap series. I want to read more of the classics Dumas, Dickens, Austen, Faulkner…etc. I am in a mood to start rereading some favorites—which it’s good the next question is:

15. What books would you like to reread? The Lord of the Rings series, the Dune series—both the ones by Frank Herbert and those by his son. I reread Rosamunde Pilcher when I need a vacation and also my …and Ladies of the Club. I reread children’s books sometimes to refresh me. I miss my King Arthur books and have been thinking about rereading them. I will reread Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan books once in a while. I think at some point I will reread Beverly Lewis’ books, too. I am going to re-start Stephen R. Donaldson’s The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever soon.

16. Who are your favorite authors? I’m pretty eclectic. Frank Herbert—he fascinates me; I’m glad his son picked up his mantle and expanded the Dune series. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis (of course)—they are “the masters.” Max Lucado is so gentle. Beverly Lewis, Wanda Brunstetter have been great to read. I will be looking for more from Brandilyn Collins and Rick Acker, also from Jack Cavenaugh. And I have to admit J.K. Rowling certainly got under my skin. I know her books were controversial, but they were good reads alouds for my family. James Herriot, another author I reread, and am planning to introduce to my sons and my niece; they’ve read his children’s works and will appreciate his more grown-up stories. Jane Austen—I was late to the party, but fell in love with her.

If you decide to do this loooooooooooooooong meme, let me know. I'd love to know more about your reading and find more books. Because there are never enough books.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Faith Lift Friday: You are My All in All



You are my strength when I am weak
You are the treasure that I seek
You are my all in all
Seeking You as a precious jewel
Lord, to give up I'd be a fool
You are my all in all

Taking my sin, my cross, my shame
Rising up again I bless Your name
You are my all in all
When I fall down You pick me up
When I am dry You fill my cup
You are my all in all

Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name
Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name

You are my strength when I am weak
You are the treasure that I seek
You are my all in all
Seeking You as a precious jewel
Lord, to give up I'd be a fool
You are my all in all

Taking my sin, my cross, my shame
Rising up again I bless Your name
You are my all in all
When I fall down You pick me up
When I get dry You fill my cup
You are my all in all

Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name
Jesus, Lamb of God
Worthy is Your name

Sung by Nichole Nordeman
Written by Dennis Jernigan

Visit Sheryl at Taking the Challenge for more Faith Lift Friday participants.

Week in Review

Well I just left it hanging there, didn’t I? On the road…and then nothing.

We did make it home, and I kept thinking I would get caught up and sit down and have me a nice blog session.

Well…I’m still catching up, although I’m amazed what can be done if I get up from the faithful pink blogging chair and get over myself and “just do it.”

Dishes keep materializing—what is up with that? I’m thinking we need to give up eating for a while…no, probably not a good idea. Maybe for me, but not two growing boys.

My school calendar is staring accusingly at me, pointing out the fact that I am not prepared for September. We are "doing school," but in a very informal way, easing back into a routine.

My menu calendar is next to the school calendar, showing me its blank pages needing to be filled, reminding me of my promise to have more organized and intentional meals (and grocery shopping—hopefully bringing the budget lower).

We have been inundated by hornets. Thankfully not aggressive, but still HORNETS with STINGERS!! And our landlord really doesn’t care much because, well, it’s not her backyard. I should not have been surprised.

I have a box of magazines I need to go through and decided what I cannot live without.

We’ve still got some mornings left of getting up near the Dark Hour—5:30-ish for me so we can leave the house by 8 A.M. to drive across a state line during rush hour to a dance class. At least we don’t have to stay there all day. And it’s only a few days a week. And they’re having a lot of fun.

There has been tending of my friend’s garden. My friend who is in Europe…and I am here in the Midwestern summer.

My presence has been requested for afternoons of supervising the swimming pool. My evenings have had offers of child-free conversations on the patio (sans hornets after dark) with my husband—who can turn down a man who wants to actually talk with you?? Not me! We’ve even had some early morning coffee outside when I’ve not had to be out the door.

All leaving my computer a bit sad and lonely. But I’ve noticed y’all have been a little quieter too when I have had a few moments to browse my Bloglines. Summertime is the time to do all those outdoor things, kids are busy and fun is waiting.

Fall is looming. Back to school is up at the Wally-World so summer is half over.

Maybe I’ll find a routine next week.

Doubt it, but maybe.

I Hearted Gev

If you’ve read my blog for any length of time, you know that I don’t blog about television much, if ever. Mostly because I don’t watch it. Home & Garden’s House Hunter’s is about the extent of my viewing. I watched the last two or three episodes of @merican Idol because we knew someone who knew someone who knew the winner (who I hearted quite a bit—but I always watched him on YouTube).

But a while back I started watching So You Think You Can Dance. I was head over heels. If you know much about me, you know I love dance. Specifically ballet, but any form of dance gets my attention. Now I passed on Dancing with the Stars, I peeked at Your Mama Don’t Dance (cute idea) a couple of times, but So You Think You Can Dance caught my heart because in ten years or less my oldest son could be doing that. My youngest would only be a few years behind.

My sons dance. A fact that gets us some quizzical looks and some unenlightened remarks sometimes. But I am very proud of what they do. They’ve joined me in my watching and have become quite the dance critics. We all have our favorites, but one of the ones we all agreed on was Gev. Gev got sent home last night. And Roo ended up in a surprising emotional state. I had to explain to him, that this is the way of the world of performing in any way—it is always an audition. Some will get the part, win the competition, do better one night than anyone else. Some won’t.

And in a way, that is really a metaphor for life; job interviews, relationships, competitions of any sort, athletic or artistic. This has been a great show to open the boys’ eyes. A few lessons we have learned vicariously are: take your corrections with a positive attitude and a smile, never speak negatively to judges (or teachers) or in front of a camera, win and lose graciously, when you dance—throw it all out there and dance your heart out. You will never second guess yourself that way.

Gev is a street dancer/break dancer who during the show has done contemporary broadway jazz, hip hop, ballroom, and jive. His attitude has been so positive. His smile is so sweet. I’m easily old enough to be his mom, and like I said, can see my boys doing this kind of thing. I had a tear or twenty when Gev got cut.

Shows like this break my heart, but at the same time they can be a really fun thing. This seems to be a sweet group of excellent dancers who, for the most part, I would be proud to know. Bittersweet fun.

I don't know how long these links will stay up. But if you haven't seen the show, here are my favorite three dances from Wednesday night.

Disclaimer: If you are easily offended by dance costumes or content, probably best to skip over. If not--enjoy!

Chelsea and Gev



Courtney and Joshua



Katee and Will