This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every moring: great is thy faithfulness. The Lord is my portion saith my soul: therefore will I hope in him. The Lord is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that seeketh him. It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD. Lamentations 3: 21-26

Monday, July 28, 2008

Standing Firm/Staying Put (Part One)

My friend Jenny--Coach Jenny--is moving. I am so very thrilled for her. I have read her blog and watched everything that has happened in her life to get her family to the point of moving. God opened doors and windows, told them to be patient, and boy oh boy, when He said, “Move!” it happened fast. And they have been obedient. Read her story, it’s so encouraging.

My sister is moving. I am happy for her. Probably happier than she is. She does not want to move. But she’s pretty sure this will be a good thing for her children. She and I have talked about the Rich Mullins song that says, “I’d rather fight You for what I don’t really want, than take what You give that I need…” Yeah, we are there.

I’ve watched doors slam closed to keep her from going one direction (the direction she preferred) and open to point her in others. It has been goose-bump evoking sometimes how everything is working out.

Two people who I care about are moving.

And I am not.

A few people who have gotten to know my through my blog know that I really want to move. I’ve been praying and hoping and planning to move for quite a while.

But I am not moving.

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Since the moment I stepped into this duplex I have been trying to figure how to move out again.

It’s true. What I wanted to write was, “Moving has been on our hearts for a while.” But that is not true. It sounds so much sweeter, but it just isn’t so. My husband and my sons, especially my sons, have been content with the space. I’m the one who wants to get out of "Dodge".

I’ve bucked and whined and thrown countless tantrums to God about this place. It’s ugly and old and ratty. I don’t like the neighborhood. I don’t like the layout. Not enough bathrooms, not enough storage, too far from this, to close to that. And God has patiently listened to all my complaints and did not budge. He has not moved (or let me move) one inch.

So imagine my surprise when out of my mouth came, “I think we should stay at least another year.”

My husband and I were having a conversation, one of how many I’ve lost count, about the pros and cons of moving. He’s heard my complaining almost as often as God has. He was saying that if it was that important, we could consider moving at the end of summer.

Imagine his surprise when I mentioned staying.

I don’t know who was more shocked, him or me.

Tomorrow I will start at the beginning; not almost five years ago when we moved in here, but almost sixteen years ago when we got married.

7 comments:

Barbara H. said...

You sound exactly like me. The first week we were in this house, I would go into the bathroom and cry because I didn't like it. We had come down on a long weekend to look at houses and Christian schools, and it was very rushed, and there were things we just didn't notice or consider about this house until we got into it. But we couldn't move right then. And every time we have considered it, it hasn't been the right time -- some uncertainty with my husband's job, possibility of moving out of state, etc.

The one thing it does have going for it is that it is close to school, church, and my mil's facility.

I've struggled to be content. We'd both still like to move -- just don't know when.

luvmy4sons said...

Been in this house for 21 years come OCtober...I figure I will die in it. My hubby is not one to move. Who knows? But it is good to go where God leads and stay where God settles. Hugs to you. Look forward to the whole story!

Heidi @ GGIP said...

I don't want to move because of the logistics of moving. My husband is out late tonight helping friends of ours move. It sounds exhausting.

Linds said...

God does weird things, Julie. I know that I hated the idea of staying here, and then it was only when I stopped thinking about what I wanted and thought, I am wasting so much of my life moaning about things, and stepped back and thought - it is actually not that bad - that things started happening. I needed to learn to be grateful for the moment. The place. Not to want different, better, more. Just to accept the blessings already in front of me. And now, who knows where I will be this time next year, or what I will be doing! It is all an adventure, albeit one with many many lessons and refining bits along the way!

Coach J said...

You know, I've wanted to move for 2 years before God gave us the "OK." Why now? Why so many seemingly obstacles to overcome? And, I'm still not there. I'm still with my parents. 7 days and counting....while that's not long, you understand the relationship.

freetofly said...

I so love that you do horses! I ALWAYS wanted to be able to indulge. While (like me in my younger days) you may wish you handled some of it differently, you have done some really neat things! It has added to the tapestry of the Julie we know and love!

Have I told you that my husband is in a serious "I want a horse mode"? But, we just joke about it. We CAN NOT take on another responsibility, sad to say!

Renee said...

I was hoping you'd be moving our way but I fully understand. God's plan and timing may not always make sense as we go through life; I know I've struggled with learning to be content where I am and wait for his timing. (Thank God he is so patient with me!)

I look forward to catching up on your posts.