This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every moring: great is thy faithfulness. The Lord is my portion saith my soul: therefore will I hope in him. The Lord is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that seeketh him. It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD. Lamentations 3: 21-26

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Procrastinator or Perfectionist?

Or both? Could it really be?

I am a FlyLady flunkie.

There I said it.

My sink doesn’t sparkle so much that a warm glow emits from it. Sometimes there are even dishes in it. All day long. (gasp!!) I don’t do that “fling” thing she talks about, and I am sure my “schedule” would make her cringe.

A year or so ago I checked out the FlyLady book from the library. I got about two chapters in and got so overwhelmed I returned the book that very day.

In reality, she has some great ideas.

I do know the days I get up, get dressed and put my shoes on, I don’t sit down as much. I keep moving. That is not something I do everyday, but I do it when I have a big project that I want to finish. And it does work. Occasionally.

The FlyLady recommends putting makeup on everyday. As part of your morning routine. Well, I did start putting makeup on again, but it is more like mid-morning, when I get around to it, and maybe it might be in the afternoon before I start driving to dance. And if I know I am really not going anywhere sometimes I get rebellious and don’t put any on at all.

But one thing the FlyLady said that I could not accept was that a lot of people become procrastinators because they are perfectionists.

Bwahahahahah….ME??? Have you seen my life? My house? My projects?

Lately, though, I’m wondering. I have heard the thought elsewhere too. Could I really be a hidden perfectionist?

We school year-round here, but keep a lighter subject schedule in the summer. So as do most homeschool moms, I start planning for the next school year in late July or early August. I’ve been blessed by some awesome materials this year; curriculum I’ve been wanting to implement, but not been able to afford. I’m sorting, organizing, planning. We have some really fun opportunities this year.

I’ve always been a seat-of-the-pants, duct tape, baling wire, tar, open-minded, relaxed type homeschooler in my approach. But this year there is so much going on. And I don’t want us to miss things by inertia default. So I started planning a schedule. And as I’ve been working on it I am getting overwhelmed. What if I miss something? (I’ve never been concerned about that before.) If we do this on Thursday then we can’t fit in that. But I like that! The boys like that. Maybe something else will have to go. I want this to be just a perfect year for them. Maybe I should just ditch the whole thing…

Aha!!

Maybe I am a perfectionist. Not perfect (‘coz we know no one but the ONE is perfect) but a perfectionist. Wikipedia's Perfectionism topic gives insight; scroll down to "Negative Aspects."

I see a pattern of putting off things until they can be done right. (And we know how often that occurs.) I see distracting myself until a situation becomes urgent and then just handling it with my usual seat-of-the-pants, duct tape, baling wire, tar, open-minded, relaxed approach with a less than perfect outcome. But I don’t think I am as relaxed as I make myself out to be.

One thing that has helped me recently is the “Do it now” rule. Or do just one more thing. What I really want to do after supper is veg out in the ugly pink blogging chair for “just ten minutes.” But ten minutes melts into twenty, thirty…oh my word, is it time for bed? So I’ve been pushing myself to clean up now, and “See, that’s done. That was easy. Why don’t you throw in a quick load of laundry?”

Obviously this has kept me away from my computer and blogging, but last week was a pretty good one in accomplishments. The boys and I started school yesterday, easing back into a more rigorous routine. The next three weeks will get progressively more challenging.

I know I will never be perfect, but I am seriously working on the procrastinator situation. I really like the outcome. Maybe I will find that book again…but then again…maybe I'll wait until I'm a little closer to perfect...

Have a great day!!

Julie

9 comments:

annie said...

That's where me and fly lady part company... I refuse to wear shoes. Except in public. I just don't see the point?

luvmy4sons said...

I love the Flylady. I don't get her e-mails any more and I don't do some of the regimented stuff but so many of her habits stuck with me and has helped me tremendously. You go girl! You can do anything for fifteen minutes, right?

Donna said...

Flylady really helps me, but I confess that I don't stick to her schedule all the time. After all, as she says, "Housework done incorrectly STILL blesses my family."

Thank God for that.

Renee said...

Okay - I admit it...I've been avoiding fly lady for years and my household skills (or lack there of - LOL) really do need it. Maybe I'll take the plunge this year. Have a great week!

Linds said...

Maybe I need to check out fly lady too. But I never wear shoes when I can help it. And perfection is vastly over-rated. I do, however wear makeup. Maybe all is not lost!

Heidi @ GGIP said...

Excellent post! Very funny also. I liked the link to the negative points of perfectionism. It DOES seem that people tend to think perfectionism is all good, but I'm pretty sure the article is correct that it isn't.

Thanks!

Liza's Eyeview said...

"I see a pattern of putting off things until they can be done right. (And we know how often that occurs.) I see distracting myself until a situation becomes urgent and then just handling it with my usual seat-of-the-pants, duct tape, baling wire, tar, open-minded, relaxed approach with a less than perfect outcome. But I don’t think I am as relaxed as I make myself out to be."

THAT's ME! I could have written this whole post!!!!

I tried FLYLADY before but got overwhelmed and quit. I think I'll try again, this time I'll try not to be a perfectionist - I said try (a mentor would say, say "you will" not just try but will actually do it) ...

Enjoy your week :)

sheryl said...

Been there, done that :) I could never get the shoes and makeup first-thing down. BUT, I credit her for the fact that today I cannot leave my bed unmade...it gets done first thing! And, I learned from her to have the house picked up before heading to bed. Beyond that her schedule overwhelmed me. I keep getting how-to-be-organized books though, and it's paid off. Over my homemaker life-span, I've learned little bits here and there that have added up to a whole lot!
Have a great week, Julie...and a great homeschooling year :)

Denitra's Den said...

Fellow FlyLady flunkie here! I can relate sooo much to what you wrote. It's funny that I've always referred to myself as a procrastinating perfectionist. I always wait to the last minute, but cram it all in because it has to be perfect. Naturally, that means cleaning only occurs before company. If the kids see me picking up they always ask, "Whose coming over?!" Imagine there surprise when I say the occasional "No one! I just want a bit of the C.H.A.O.S. to end!"